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Getting out of the Mood
I Want To Watch Porn With My Husband, But I’m Rolling Off the Bed Laughing
Amusing me was not his objective that afternoon
“Sometimes, just for fun, I type some random, silly word in front of the word porn and google it. Just to see if it exists. Because that means people out there are getting off on it. So I googled Nazi porn. Yupp. It exists. Then I googled goldfish porn. Yupp. Found it. Someone out there finds sex with goldfish arousing. Fart porn. Yes, that’s a thing too, and it brings someone somewhere great pleasure. Stormtrooper porn. Yes, the force is strong with that one. And it’s not even a Saturday Night Live parody. It’s literally hardcore porn, featuring men dressed in Stormtrooper outfits. With surprisingly high production values.”
― Oliver Markus Malloy, Why Creeps Don’t Know They’re Creeps — What Game of Thrones can teach us about relationships and Hollywood scandals
I am sitting around relaxing when my spouse suggests we get naked and watch the Adult Video News Awards (AVN). At the AVN awards, they give out sex industry Oscars for the best of the various sex acts and acting performances in porn movies. The awards are fun to watch as you get to see all the new pornography stars and the continuing success of a few of the mature performers.
My spouse and I watch the show yearly and then hunt down the films with the best performances. (If your nose is wrinkled, jump out of this article now, but not before you count to 30, so Medium does not punish me. Don’t judge. Move on.)
“AVN is short for the Adult Video News Awards, a four-day event held in Las Vegas every January that’s best described as “the Oscars of Porn.” It’s a reference the Academy’s probably not thrilled about, but nonetheless that’s basically what AVN is” hollywoodreporter.com, Martin A. Grove, Commentary: ‘Naked’ look at Oscars of porn, AVN Award
Like all award shows, the AVNs are hours long, so you must plan time for them. We decided it is too much to watch the winning films (and acts) in the middle of the day, so instead, we go to a site and watch clips — putting the AVNs off until our Saturday movie night.
